Question to the Rabbi: Who is the head of the family?
Community
The question of who is the head of the family worries many modern people. In a world where words about equality and independence are increasingly heard, the idea of the "head of the family" can be perceived as a relic of the past. However, in Judaism, this concept has a completely different meaning — not power or submission, but the spiritual order of the family, based on harmony and mutual respect.The Torah defines the male and female roles not as a struggle for primacy, but as a mutual complement. A man is truly considered the head of the family — not because he is superior, but because he has a special responsibility for the spiritual direction of the home, material support and the overall stability of the family. This is not a power, but aduty. The role of a man is to lead, protect, provide, be a support.A woman is the keeper of the inner world of the family. The wise say, “A wise woman builds her house.” It has an atmosphere of comfort, respect and faith, as well as soft power, thanks to which a man can reveal his potential. In the treatiseYevamotit is said, “A man without a wife is an incomplete man,” for it is the woman who makes the house the place of the presence of the Shekhinah, the Divine presence.Rambam wrote that a wife should honor her husband “above all measures” as a king. But in the same laws, he adds: the husband is obliged to respect his wife more than himself, and to love her as himself. He must take care of her well-being, be soft in words, not cause fear and not show anger. Only with such mutual respect is true harmony born.The modern Jewish family may look different than it did in Talmudic times, but the principles remain the same. A man is not a dictator, but a responsible leader; a woman is not a subordinate, but an equal partner who inspires and supports. Together, they create a whole where everyone has their own role, their own gift, and their own holiness.Judaism does not call for the struggle of the sexes, but for the creation of a union in which everyone serves the Almighty, realizing exactly the role for which he was created. Afamily built on such principles becomes what the sages call a home full of respect, love, and light.Source:toldot